Monday, January 31, 2011

14 weeks!

I have included 2 pictures for your enjoyment because my little tummy has popped!

Total weight gain: Started at 175. Today said 168.
Maternity clothes? I did wear them last week, I admit. But I don't need them exclusively. There is a pair of super cute jeans that my friend loaned me and they were SO COMFY!!!
Sleep: Better now that I have a snoogle. But Sunday nights still suck
Best moment this week: hitting 2nd tri. Hearing a GOOD STRONG heartbeat on the doppler for about 20 seconds before LPG swam away.
Gender: Back and forth, but still predominately boy
Craving: VINEGAR!!!! MALT vinegar!!!!!!
Movement: Nope
Labor Signs: No.
Belly Button in or out? In. But it's been hurting! Is that weird?
What I miss: Nada
What I am looking forward to: Appointment on the 9th, even though I don't know what will happen. Anatomy scan on March 7th!!!
Milestones: 2nd tri baby!!!!! Also, I have included a picture of my personal milestone. I have officially gone one entire month without biting my nails! YAY Resolution coming to fruition! I think they look pretty and LPG has them nice and strong! :)

Wednesday, January 26, 2011

Week 13 Letter

Dearest LPG,

As we approach our 2nd trimester together, I want to say how wonderful it has been sharing the last 3 and a half months with you. Since the moment I knew you were growing inside of me, I have loved you more than I thought it possible to love. I cannot believe how much you have grown and changed, and I cannot wait to see how much you continue to grow and change. I am so happy to know that in just a few months, you will be in our arms and a welcome part of our family. As I start my 2nd trimester with you, a huge milestone for the both of us, I want you to know one of the most important and heartfelt things I can tell you.

Her point was that there was too much love and beauty for just the two of us….
And every day we kept a child out of the world was a day he might later regret having missed.
—H.I. McDunnough, Raising Arizona

This quote came from the Daddy book that Daddy is reading. And it sums up, perfectly, the theme of this weeks letter, which is: "Why we wanted you." This quote speaks volumes about the reasons Mommy and Daddy decided it was time to bring you into the world. In fact, when Daddy first read it, we kind of choked up because it defined us so clearly.

Your daddy and I, we consider ourselves fairly happy people. We are thankful and blessed for all the good fortune we have had in our lives. We love each other so entirely and truly that we couldn't possibly ask for much more. We live in a place where the sun is always shining. We have good, steady jobs, amazing family and friends, and just overall a wonderful life. How could we keep you from all of that? How dare we? Like the quote says, there is too much love and beauty for just the two of us. There is so much love and beauty to share.

To be perfectly honest, Mommy wanted a baby far sooner than she thought she would, and sooner than Daddy was ready. I attribute this to your daddy. I never wanted to be a mother so badly until I married him. After that, I couldn't imagine anything more wonderful than giving him a child. Carrying on our love and our legacy in the world. It would truly be an honor. So, I patiently waited until Daddy realized that every day without you might be a regret we could have missed. We weren't sure you'd arrive so swiftly. It took a few months of trying, but far shorter than many people wait. We count ourselves lucky for that blessing. And we cannot wait to include you in our lives, making sure that none of us ever regret another moment. Because, LPG, once you are here, there will be no regrets. We will give you the happiest and fullest life that one little person can have. We may not do so with fancy toys, or expensive trips. But we will give you all the love and beauty that we can muster.

In short, LPG, we want you so badly because we love each other so much. And now, we love you even more than that. We have more than enough love for just the two of us, and for Lucy and Beezer. And the amazing thing about love? It multiplies when it is shared. We know that once you are here, we will love you far more than we ever thought we had the capacity to. We want to show you all the promise and wonder in the world. Don't get me wrong--the world isn't perfect. There are struggles and problems. But me and your daddy? We know what matters. Family and friends? Love and laughter? That's what matters in this world. And because of that, we know we will be able to provide for you the most amazing life.

LPG, we can't wait to share this world with you. We will do everything to ensure your happiness. We want you because we need you--because you will complete our family in a way we cannot. We want you because you are special, and perfect, and OURS. We want you because the moment you enter this world, it will instantly become a better, brighter place. So snuggle in, grow lots, and be prepared for life with these two crazy people who love you so desperately.

Love you more than Daddy loves March Madness,
Your momma.

Monday, January 24, 2011

Week 13

Total weight gain: Still down 6 lbs
Maternity clothes? Not quite. I used the bella band for some of my pants. Needing more loose shirts, though, and thankfully, my wonderful co-worker gave ma a huge box!
Sleep: Hit or miss
Best moment this week: I suppose there was nothing special so far
Gender: Feeling boy, keep referring to LPG as a "he"
Craving: still feeling the mustard. A few little ones here and there...nothing huge
Movement: Nope
Labor Signs: No.
Belly Button in or out? In.
What I miss: Not hurting? I am aching this week
What I am looking forward to: Next appt on the 9th, meeting the OB for the first time. Developing my birth plan with my future Doula :)
Milestones: Almost out of first tri! 3 days!

Thursday, January 20, 2011

Dear Little Point Guard--Week 12--Friends

Hello my beautiful little one.

This week has been absolutely amazing, because it started out with me and Daddy seeing your perfect little self on a screen. It is utterly amazing how much you have grown in just 4 weeks. You have gone from a curled up little blob (for lack of a better word), to a beautiful, kicking, rolling, moving machine. We can already see that you have Daddy's nose, and clearly, both of our spunk. You wouldn't sit still--instead, you were eager to show off all the twists and turns and punches and kicks you could muster. It was so wonderful to watch, LPG, and by far, the best day of my life. Knowing you are in there, growing and stretching and moving, well it fills me with such joy that I can hardly find the words. I cannot wait until we see you again, and when we find out if you are a little boy point guard or a little girl point guard on March 7th.

In the last few weeks, LPG, I have talked to you about your family, including your pets. Family is so very important, but there is another blessing in life: Friends. Friends are like your family, only they find you, you aren't assigned to them. If you are lucky enough, you find friends that last a lifetime, and become family to you.

Historically, your mommy hasn't been a social butterfly. I have never had a great deal of friends, and now, I'm ok with that. But, there was a time in my life, and there will too be a point in yours, when I guaged my self-worth based on how many friends I had. It is unfortunate that I ever had to see things in such a way, and I hope to guide you to a path of better understanding. Now, I know better, and I guage myself on the QUALITY of my friendships, not the quantity. You can have a million friends, but none who would do anything for you, be there when you need them, or give up anything to make you happy. And if you have just ONE friend who would do all of that for you, then you already have something far more worthwhile than the million worthless friends.

LPG, your mommy and daddy are quite blessed with our friends. Your daddy has a core group of friends who he has known for years and years. They have grown up together, lived and changed together, and remain steadfast friends through it all. I know that we could count on them for anything, and they would be there to help. There are names you will hear throughout your life, Kevin and Alana (and their precious little girl), Pat and Heather, Jeff, Don, Jason, Ben, Harnoor, all are great friends of your daddy, and now, of your mommy. We are lucky to have them. Mommy doesn't have the same small group, but she does have wonderful friends who are like family. Your Aunt Jamie has given Mommy a second family, as well as her own goddaughter and nephews to love, and she will be an ever-present figure in your life. There are other names of other friends that Mommy loves dearly: Susan, Rachel, Stephanie and Krista, Rhonda, Amanda, Ashley, other Stephanie :) truth, we could go on about our amazing friends and their amazing qualities for days and days, and bore you quite easily to tears. All I can say, LPG, is all of these people are part of the family who loves you, knows you, and can't wait to make your life special and perfect.

There are times in life, my perfect baby, where things seem too difficult to carry on, and you couldn't possibly move forward. It is precisely those times where your friends will make a difference. They will carry you when you can't go on, give you the motivation to fight when you have none, and love you when you feel least worthy of love. Sometimes, friendship doesn't last, but that doesn't mean that person wasn't important, or didn't serve a special purpose in your life. Harboring resentment over life's changes is fruitless, and only builds unncessary anger. It is better, LPG, to remember that the friends you need will always be there. No matter if you live down the street from them, or 2000 miles away, it never changes. It doesn't matter if you talk every day, or every month, or whenever each of you has 4 free minutes to type a facebook IM before rushing off to life's busy requirements. Your true friends find a place in your heart, make it their own, and always keep it warm and full of love.

I know that you will find friends as wonderful as ours to fill your life with joy. I also know that Mommy and Daddy will take great care and concern to show you how to be a good friend, how to love selflessly, and how to understand the changes friendships may encounter. What we want most of all, for you, is to love and be loved. We already love you so very much, and we can't wait until you are here and sharing your love with the rest of the world.

Until next week, my dear, keep kicking away in there. I know that I will feel you soon.

Love and a big, round, orange ball,

Monday, January 17, 2011

The kind-of NT scan

Today, I had two doctors appointment. The first was my physical (yayyyyy so glad I don't have to do that for a year) and the second was our NT scan.

At my physical appointment, LPG did not want anything to do with the doppler. Everytime she got the heartbeat, we would hear a thud, and LPG would move away. She laughed and said that this baby wasn't going to get away so easily. So after the appointment, she took out the ultrasound wand.

Oh and how time stood still.

It was so amazing. I could see the long legs kicking. I could see Daddy's nose, clear as day. Everything has changed so much in just 4 short weeks.

But it only lasted about a minute. After verifying the heartbeat, I scuttled on my way. We were coming back for the NT scan, anyway. We went back at 3pm. This time, as I watched my baby wiggle and twist and kick and punch, I got to watch my husband's face. It was the most amazing 25 minutes of my life. I can't even describe the emotion and joy I felt.

However, LPG is already a little on the strange side. To begin with, LPG is upside down. Completely. Head down. Whenever he or she would move, we could see he or she twist around like a headstand. It was so very cool to watch. But the tech could not get LPG to flip the right way to get the NT measurements. So we were unable to see the measurements that way. They will just focus on the quad screen instead. But we were able to see the nasal bone clearly, which is another Down's marker so that was good. We also saw the heart beat pound away, as well as the stomach. It was so incredible.

Here is our beautiful baby.

12 weeks!

Total weight gain: Down 6 lbs
Maternity clothes? No, but the beband will be used this week
Sleep: SOOOOO much better!
Best moment this week: Seeing our perfect little baby move around and wiggle and kick on the ultrasound screen
Gender: Feeling boy
Movement: Nada, but there is clearly a LOT going on in there
Labor Signs: No.
Belly Button in or out? In.
What I miss: I miss nothing
What I am looking forward to: Every single day with this baby.
Milestones: Seeing movement! <3

Tuesday, January 11, 2011

Week 11 letter--Your Pets

Dearest LPG,

Today is 1/11/11 and we are 11 weeks together! I think that's pretty special. I hope you have had a great week of growing. Mommy and Daddy can hear your heartbeat on our doppler now. We know for sure it's you, because at first, we were hearing me and THOUGHT it was you. But now we hear me, and we hear your little heart beat chugging away right behind it. It made your daddy smile so big. He thought you were waving and saying "HI DADDY!" He loves you so much, and so do I. We are less than one week away from seeing you again, and we can't wait. Neither can all of our students! They are so anxious for you, and apparently think of themselves as 14 year old aunts and uncles. Goofballs, the lot of them! Either way, it's nice to have so many people excited for you.

This week isn't too deep or meaningful. I just wanted to tell you a little bit about your 2 pets. These two furry animals will be at home when you get there, so introducing you now seems quite logical :) They are already quite interested in you, and seem to recognize that something is different. But mostly, I just want to share with you because you have the two best animals on the planet, and they will love you and take care of you as you grow up. (I will add pictures of them, later, but they are all on my other computer for now).

First of all, let's talk about your kitty, Beezer. Beezer is somewhere around 7 years old (we think). When Daddy moved to California in 2005, Mommy still had another year of college to complete. He was quite lonesome, so he decided to get a cat. Right about when he made that decision, he had a student who was moving away, and couldn't take their cat with them. It was a black cat, which is exactly what Daddy wanted. They said he was about 3 years old then. So, Daddy adopted him. At the time, his name was Kitty. The weekend that Daddy adopted him, Mommy flew out to visit, and they came up with his name together. He looked like a panther, and John VanBiesbrock was a goalie for the Florida Panthers. People used to call him "Beezer" and chant it. When mommy said the name, jokingly, it immediately fit this fat black cat in front of them.

Beezer is an odd cat, but you'll come to discover that most cats are odd. His favorite thing is food. Any type of food. His fat stomach gives that away pretty quickly. His second favorite thing is sleeping. Beezer is a champion sleeper! His third favorite thing is talking, and his forth is head-butts. Beezer is not overly affectionate, but when he wants to cuddle, he WANTS to cuddle. Sometimes he sleeps at Mommy's feet, and sometimes, he stays by himself in the living room. We were worried that Beezer wouldn't be a "kid" animal. But, not too long ago, we had 2 toddlers in the house. Beezer was perfectly well behaved, let them chase him, and even pull his tail! We are happy to see that Beezer is ready for you, LPG! You may hear us call him: Beezo, Beezo-kitty, Mr. Kittykins, or Kittums. He will probably think most of your stuff is his stuff. That is just his way. :)

Now, let's talk about your dog. LPG, you don't know it yet, but you have the greatest dog in all the world. This is no exaggeration, and many people would back up this statement completely. Your dog, Lucy, is special. And so is how she came to be in our family. In February 2007, Mommy was teaching Saturday school at the high school. It is a big detention hall for bad kids. She decided to hold it in her classroom, instead of the main hall, because she had work to do. At around noon, she was letting the kids out and getting ready to go home. As she escorted them to the gate, they all saw a tiny puppy running laps around Mommy's portable. Each time she would run by, she would let out a "GRUFF," and continue running. A student pointed out a pile of dogfood to the side of the gate, and said, "I think someone left it here." Your mommy has a bleeding heart when it comes to animals, so she called for the students to grab it. But this little pup was illusive, and snuck by them into the street. At least 6 students were chasing her down, trying to grab her. She nearly got run over by a truck! Finally, by sheer luck, a student was able to snatch her up as she ran by. She brought her to mommy. Mommy called Daddy to say she would be late, because she was taking this little puppy to the humane society. Daddy said, "Puppy? Is she cute?" And she was. She looked like a baby german shepherd, but she was REALLY long. So, Daddy asked Mommy to bring her by the apartment first. She did, and the moment she set the dog on the floor, she bounded over to daddy, jumped in his lap and licked his face. I'm pretty sure his heart melted in that moment. However, the pup was very well behaved. She didn't pee on the floor at all. So, we knew it was the right thing to do to take her in, in case someone had indeed lost her. Mommy called the humane society every day for the week holding period. No one came to claim her. So on the day she was available, Mommy took a sick day, and went and adopted her.

Lucy is the sweetest, most loving, most adorable dog. She is part german shepherd and part daschund. That means she's part weiner dog! Lucy loves her mommy and daddy more than anything, and loves to be near them all the time. She also loves to tug, chew, and have running time (just like outside Mommy's classroom). Lucy is very well behaved, and hates to make Mommy or Daddy upset. She loves her morning treats, LOVES her blue buffalo food, and loves her kitty brother. Beezer has recently decided to love her, too, so they are a happy family. Lucy has gone through a lot in her little life, and we are so very happy that she's ours. We know that one day, when you first stand up, she will be there, right beside you. The perfect height to learn how to walk. Lucy will be YOUR dog, and she will love you and give you lots of kisses.

LPG, you can see that we are bringing you into a very happy and loving family. Until you, our pets have been our babies. We love them, and we know they will love you, look out for you, and play with you all the time. We promise to always have animals for you to play with, because they make more fun and definitely more loving!

Well, LPG, the next time I write to you, I will have seen your perfect little self on an ultrasound screen again. I cannot wait. Until then, wish Daddy luck on his big rivalry game tonight! You will be there, with me, cheering in the stands!

Love always,
Your mommy

Monday, January 10, 2011

11 weeks

Total weight gain: Down 4 lbs. Interesting.
Maternity clothes? No, but dresses are my new bff.
Sleep: Awfulawfulawfulawfulawful I want to cry all the time
Best moment this week: Telling the staff and my students. They were so excited.
Gender: Every student has input on this, I will say that much!
Craving: Thursday, I really needed pimento spread and sesame snack sticks. It was soooooo tasty.
Movement: Nada
Labor Signs: No.
Belly Button in or out? In.
What I miss: Definitely sleeping. Oh sleeping. I so miss you.
What I am looking forward to: NT scan on the 17th
Milestones: Being able to listen on the doppler, knowing our baby is the size of a lime!

Monday, January 3, 2011

Week 9 and 10 Letter-Momma and Daddy's families

Dear LPG,

Hello there my little one. You are the size of a prune this week. I can't believe how much you are growing. I am excited to see you look like a real baby on the 17th. I just know you will be perfect, and every day, my excitement doubles. I will be meeting you THIS YEAR! :)

Today, I wanted to give you a quick summary of your parents wonderful families. They will shower you with love and affection from day one, so I want you to know who they are! :)

Momma's immediate family is small, but my extended family is huge. Your Granny and Grandpa, Phyllis and Bill, have been married since August 8th, 1980. They are crazy and madly in love. I also have a sister, Chelsey. You also have 2 wonderful great-grandmas. Unfortunately, your great-grandpas will not be with us, but they love you just the same.

On my side, you have tons of great-aunts, great-uncles, and cousins that are more like brothers and sisters. Uncle Eric, Aunt Maggie, Uncle Jason and Uncle Jacob are 4 names in particular you should know. On Grandpa's side, you will be the first of this next generation of babies, just like I was when I was born! So you will be especially loved and adored. On Granny's side, you are the 6th great-grandchild.

Daddy's immediate family is also on the small side. Your Nana and Grandpa, Beth and Jerry, met at the same college that Mommy and Daddy attended. In fact, one of your potential names, if you are a boy, is where they met! :) Your daddy has a younger brother, Uncle Jon, and a younger sister, Aunt Emily. Unfortunately, your great-grandpas are also missing from this side, as well as one great-grandma. But, your great-grandma is wonderful and will love you so desperately.

You do not have quite so many great-aunts, great-uncles and cousins to remember from this side. Uncle Alex will undoubtedly be ever present in your life, however. You will love him! On your Nana's side, you are also the first great-grandchild! You will undoubtedly be loved and adored by everyone.

What you should know, LPG, is that your family is full of love. Things aren't always perfect, but as you will come to find out, few things in life are. Sometimes, there are disagreements. Sometimes, people drift apart, but they usually find their way back. What matters most of all, through all the imperfections, is love. Family is forever. Family means forgiveness, and understanding, and unending, incredibly strong love. But that doesn't mean its flawless.

No matter what has happened throughout my life, I have known that my family will always be there for me. And I am so lucky to have married a man whose family embraces me as there own, as well. LPG, you will be so very loved, and these families will ensure that you know that. At 10 weeks, you are already so very loved. I can't even imagine how it will grow when you are here.

As a quick side note, today, Mommy and Daddy told everyone at work. That means we also told all of our students. They are all so very excited for us, and for you. It has been such a joy to share our happy news, even if you are busy making me very exhausted and unable to sleep. It's ok. I love you anyway, even more than yesterday, tons more than last week. I love you, LPG.

Love from the 3 point line,

Week 10

Total weight gain: Same, down 2 lbs.
Maternity clothes? No, but the Beband may be used soon
Sleep: Awful. Insomnia is back. And it sucks
Best moment this week: New Years eve
Gender: I go back and forth
Craving: Cheeseburgers, I guess
Movement: Nada
Labor Signs: No.
Belly Button in or out? In.
What I miss: This week? Sleeping.
What I am looking forward to: NT scan on the 17th
Milestones: I found the HB with my doppler :)

I am also behind on my week 9 letter. I will have it hopefully sometime this week, along with week 10. Break had me toooooo relaxed! Back to reality!